When everyone around you is in a relationship.

Let us be real just for one minute. When your clique is getting bigger, and by bigger I mean people bringing in partners, you sometimes lose your shit. And by sometimes I mean constantly. Only because these partners are outsiders, and they haven’t earned their way into the group. But what happens when these people were already a member of the group and they suddenly link up with another member? That is probably one of the biggest nightmares for almost any single gal out there. Maybe even the single boys. But mainly the girls. And don’t judge if you think “All this ho thinks about are boys and relationships and why she is still single and keeps bitching”. Well listen here, I tell my girls to their face all this anyway, so technically I’m not bitching. I’m just turning my woes in to some light hearted reading. Back to the topic, when everyone around you is in a relationship, I mean four of my close girlfriends are now happily taken. And do not get me wrong, I am thoroughly happy for them all! (Big shout out to one of them for just celebrating their one year anniversary!). But let us please be real, I beg of you, does it not get annoying? When you’re the single one, especially being one of the ‘outspoken, strong and stylish’ dare I say it, ones in the group? And just to be clear, you all are stylish ladies! Am I the only one that gets, let’s use “lonely” for better terms, lonely at night? And for all those people that say I don’t need a man to make me happy, who the hell are you even kidding? Feminists would probably hate me right now, but hey, it is the truth. At least for me it is. We single gals see all you non-single gals. Going out to places, we as friends had planned, going down the beach for a stroll, or a surprise picnic. We see you going off on holidays, we see you spending a day together. We also notice it when, you don’t tell your single friends what you plan to do, when we ask if you’re free. It is okay guys. We will not bite your head off. We single people would like to be kept in the loop so we do not look like idiots half the time. Other than that, keep at the relationship and let it blossom.

My main goal for this article was to talk about what goes on when almost everyone around you are in relationships. Well what happens when my friends are in relationships. It is not a bad thing. It is not something I hate. I actually love to bitch about couples, IN FRONT of couples. Shout out to my girls that I give shit to everyday! The thing is, it can get annoying and frustrating. Especially when you go through a crisis of “I will never find someone” and “why am I single, I am a nice person” kind of phase and your friends give the advice of “you will find someone” or “all in good time” or “relationships aren’t all that”. Mother fucker, if relationships really aren’t all that, then why the hell are you even in one? Kind of begs the question does it not? And for those who always say all in good time, nothing ever happens in good time. Especially when you are crying in bed, under the sheets, from watching Ps I love you just a little too much. People that are in relationships, please do not give single people advice about why they aren’t in one, it just infuriates us even more.

This is not an article to hate, belittle or bitch about, this is just something that I, as a single girl surrounded by couples, go through and I just felt it would be good to write about.
Any readers that feel the same, or go through similar things, leave a comment, discuss what goes on within your circle! Nothing to be ashamed for, single people sometimes need a little attention from time to time.
And single boys, leave your number.

x

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What do we really feel? Full article.

These past couple of months have been pretty full on for me personally. Friendships have gotten stronger, relationships have been built and broken down, some have gone through phases and gotten better and some have ended in tragedy. New relationships have begun and old flames have been rekindled. So lately I’ve been thinking during these times, when we’re with someone special, what do we feel? Most of us cite similar emotions such as, butterflies aka queasy stomach, heart beats faster and sweaty palms (only if they’re extra special though!). HOWEVER, I also thought THAT if most of us feel these kinds of emotions, then what do we really feel towards a person? Behind all the butterflies and accelerated heartbeats, which emotion is the driving force that ignites our love and passion towards this individual?

Sitting here in my robe, with my nails done, I think to myself, how is it that I can feel so much love or pain towards one person, and then have so many more emotions that drive me up the wall. This particular post is about a particular person. He could be the love of my life, or he could be that one guy I go back to always, even when it’s wrong. Who knows, because I sure as hell have no idea? Emotionally, we’re all a little, pardon my French, fucked up. And admit it, our feelings have messed us over time and time again. Sometimes we absolutely adore someone and the next day we want to smash their heads in. But my question remains, how and why? And the fact also remains, if these “feelings” were taken out of us, do we still love a person or are we merely acting on love because of how our bodies respond to him/her?

Recently the guy I’m seeing asked me about songs that I liked because he wanted to find “our song”. At first I had butterflies, I will admit to that and instantly started sorting out all the songs I loved to send to him to listen to. But, then I realised I got butterflies because of something sweet he had asked. Why didn’t I get butterflies when we would talk during the rest of the evening? How is it possible that I could at one hour feel merely happy to have him and the next hour I was over the moon to have him? I mean aren’t I supposed to be completely ecstatic about this relationship? Other people certainly are going totally crazy happy for me and I sit there in disgust actually. Maybe it’s just me that has this reaction towards couples and relationships. Lord knows I love all my friends who are in blissful relationships but when it comes to personal issues, I just plain and simple barf, no joke. At the end of this week I realised that I was lucky in having this guy. Even after all my bitchy episodes, he still stuck around. I don’t blame him, my laugh brings him back (anyone that knows me, know that my laugh is hideous!).

In reality, we simple humans, over complicate simple issues. We take something like, “he liked my profile picture” and turn it into hours of gossip trying to figure out if he likes us, when really he just liked a photo, that’s all. I know, we take situations and try to analyse what the possible meaning could be. And it’s there, where we complicate and confuse our own emotions into believing and thinking one thing could give us butterflies and heart palpitations, good or bad, and that’s when we’ve got it wrong. Anything can make us happy. And it’s more than anything that a certain person can give us these feelings. I mean, Troy Bolton (Zachary David Alexander Efron) made my heart skip every time he spoke, sang or smiled. So the fact is, any emotion can be a driving factor into making us love an individual and at the end of the day it always comes down to how our lives are and how we interact with them. I stare at Ghetto Booty from afar, I feel nothing but heat for that man and his ass (he has a nice ass). I read messages from the unlucky fellow that asked me out and I feel happiness because this guy chose me, lord knows he crazy but he chose me. Life is constantly throwing people and situations at us, we just need to know what we feel and what we feel will lead us on the right path.

Good luck readers on your feelings this week. 

x

What do we really feel? Sneak peak!

These past couple of months have been pretty full on for me personally. Friendships have gotten stronger, relationships have been built and broken down, some have gone through phases and gotten better and some have ended in tragedy. New relationships have begun and old flames have been rekindled. So lately I’ve been thinking during these times, when we’re with someone special, what do we feel? Most of us cite similar emotions such as, butterflies aka queasy stomach , heart beats faster and sweaty palms (only if they’re extra special though!). HOWEVER, I also thought THAT if most of us feel these kinds of emotions, then what do we really feel towards a person? Behind all the butterflies and accelerated heartbeats, which emotion is the driving force that ignites our love and passion towards this individual?

Why do we wait?

I think I have tested my Zuzu’s patience enough to finally post this up. Truth be told I wrote this a couple hours ago. There have been so many topics I wanted to talk about but very little “evidence” to say the least to back up my words. But after a few weeks of therapeutic talking to a close close friend and a couple of Sex and the City seasons later, I figured out what I wanted to write out about. Why are we waiting for that one person? In all seriousness why are some women waiting for that one man? I mean are we not content with any other male that we must have only that one guy? Or have we really fallen only for this one person?

Most of us to say the least have experienced the feeling love, if not love itself. And at the point is when dare I say it, we feel complete. Do we not? I know that it brings much joy and happiness when that love is reciprocated. But what about when it’s not, or when it’s too little from him?  Some women will simply move on and find another to fill those feelings. But some women will wait it out. And it’s those women, I salute and honour, because to wait for someone who could be your true love is a test of your patience and a test of love to say the very least. But here I am, still not understanding why we do this! And by we, I do include myself.

Let me tell you a little secret. That guy I had a crush on a year ago and didn’t send a friend request to? I still have a crush on him and I haven’t sent a friend request yet. This “crush” has gotten me in some serious shit, let’s be real here, but it also has made me become someone I don’t want to be. A lady that waits. And trust I am waiting for nothing, because this guy, I and he will never happen. But here I am, still waiting. Why? If my words correct me, is this love? Hell no it ain’t love! If it was, I would’ve lost all my weight by now and be walking around university in skimpy clothes (because that’s his type).

 I have a friend, who is probably one of the most gorgeous ladies I have ever met. She is practically my soul sister and I love her to bits. She’s the inspiration to this article, because she is a truly patient woman. Here I am complaining about this guy and there she stands, patiently waiting for this guy to finally come to his senses and realise that they actually belong together. He makes her laugh when she’s down. He makes her smile as soon as he walks towards her. His hugs make her feel safe. His goofy behaviours brings light to her dreadful days. His presence gives her warmth. He is all she wants. And there he is, not knowing how she feels and what she wants. I know he likes her, but he has a lot going on and it’s not even certain that at the end of his decision making process he would want her. Yet she waits.

I ask her, “If you find another worthy of you and your time, will you move on?” And she simply answers, “I will but he will never be like him”. Ladies and gentlemen, here we have a true test of love. If she even dares call it love, I surely will. I still wonder why we wait for that one person. Even if we’ve broken up and gone forward in our lives, why do we still hold ourselves for this one guy? Why are we so hopeful in that he might change his ways, he might understand where I was coming from, he might finally realise that I am the one? Happiness comes in many forms. The greatest form of happiness is when we feel loved by the one we love and when we don’t, we are not content.

Comment and leave a reply with your own thoughts ladies and gentlemen! Tell me what you think!

This article is dedicated to my personal Sofia Vergara. You are the Sofia to my Mindy :*

Self-concious little bitch

It’s been quite some time that I posted in my blog let alone write anything for Warhol’s Children and a friend of mine stumbled across my articles that I felt the need to write a new one, but the problem was I had so many issues to talk about that I opted for the one that related to me most- what to do when we like someone and we’re self-conscious. It’s been a year and I’ve had a “crush” on this guy, and I use the word crush loosely because quite frankly I only like to stare at him for aesthetic reasons. Those who know me, know exactly who I’m speaking about. But in my situation I don’t speak to him, or at least not all the time. Just casual sentences thrown here and there and looks across the cafeteria, that’s it. I’m usually confident in myself and I don’t get that shy but around this fellow, I lose my shit and become a ‘normal’ person. My issue here is why? Why do I do this? Why does my behaviour change? In this article I’m not hoping to find answers but I’m looking to start discussions between people who feel and do the same. Maybe even get some courage to send him a friend request on Facebook?

Usually since birth girls are taught to be pretty, smart and lady-like. And even Satan knows that I am nowhere near lady like! So when there’s a girl like me, what am I to do because I sure as hell love the way I am now but if society persists that be kind, delicate and soft then is there really no hope for me in the department of men? And if so, then what really is the point of having these attributes if girls are setting themselves up for nothing but a life long journey of rejection or being alone? But wait, what if there is a guy that likes these qualities? WHERE Y’ALL HIDING?? See for me I think we need to accept and appreciate everyone around us. These people could’ve taken another road in their life and wouldn’t have been where they are now. Do we really want some people in our lives to be gone?

Friendships are amazing. I have an amazing group of friends and I wouldn’t trade them for the world, maybe for Jay Sean I would but hey that won’t happen so my group need not worry. But my point being, these people have accepted me and loved me or I hope they do, for who I am, so why won’t other people like this guy? I mean I am nice, I think? It all comes down to society and how we have grown up and our perspectives. See it’s embedded in us certain norms and looks that are accepted. We are constantly fed imagery and entertainment that constantly show what the ideal female is like. And don’t go saying that isn’t true because even if your girlfriend isn’t what mainstream media thinks, I guarantee you she thinks it anyway.

It’s sad that women are somewhat forced into following the convention instead of working out who they are because media projects that image. I know I try to be who I am but sometimes society reminds me what is ‘wanted’ and I go back into my black hole. I think at the end of the day love yourself, ironically I tell everyone to love themselves but I don’t love myself every day and love everyone around you. Accept and appreciate. Oh and getting to the topic of this post – self-consciousness and liking someone- just be yourself, I know I acted normal and tried to look good in front of him and he didn’t like me , so I might as well scare him with my laugh and let him never try what could have been. At the end of it everyone, follow your own heart and soul, never of mainstream media.

Peace and love to you all!

This article goes out to my dear Zuzu- who is always filled with kindness.

The One

Lately I have witnessed many people around me getting into relationships and out of them. Some are thinking of what they are today and some are thinking what they can be in the future. Some have no idea what’s happening and just stay happy in the moment. And then there are people like me. Single, ready to mingle, yet not a soul in the distance to jingle. But we like to stay optimistic.

Nevertheless what I’ve been thinking about are Soul-mates. How many of us are in search for the perfect person? That one person that can make us laugh in a heartbeat and knows exactly what we like and dislike. They are two simple words yet rattle my core to its death. Of course I’m hoping to find him. But then it crossed my mind. What if I already found him but didn’t know because I put him in the friend list, or I stopped talking to him? Someone once said that “love is friendship set on fire”, so what if my soul-mate is indeed a friend? If so, how does one even know? I mean, is he someone I talk to everyday or is he someone I know at university? Maybe he’s someone I tell all my issues to or he might be someone I talk to at two in the morning? But if he is indeed a friend, how do I tell him that he’s the one for me. What if I’m not the one for him and in fact he’s already in a wonderful relationship or he’s searching for someone that he projects to be perfect for him?

So many questions, not enough answers. I often wonder how many women are out there who have found the one but are disguised as friends. And some for the men. A perfect woman is projected in their minds and they search for her but maybe your perfect woman is a friend.

So for my final thought -For those who are searching or yearning for someone, your perfect person could be in fact a friend. Stop and think of who makes you the happiest. Good Luck readers. x

The Work Place

In life it is standard to work. Whether it is in the field of your interest or whether it is for the sake of survival. Twenty something year olds work to pay for their very expensive iPhone bills, pay for rent, and support families in some instances. So many of my friends have been in the work force for quite some time. Either in the same position or in and out of different jobs. I however just recently progressed into the workforce. Being 20 with no paid experience and very little volunteering done the industry was not kind. Luckily enough a kind man hired me because I paid interest in his life during the interview, and I was genuinely interested in the job and well today I stand a working class women, of course with a HECS debt over my head and still studying. However what I was relatively new to was the fact that work can be ruthless and what’s worse is the people you’re surrounded by. My neighbouring office is a financial firm- one would think they keep to themselves with their calculators and clients but it is quite the opposite. In fact they men are the friendliest people there and the women are probably the scariest. I know the people at my close friend’s workplace are all nice but they’re also favourites to the manager over her. The beauty of not working with anyone but a self-employed person is you don’t need to compete for hours or work. What you do need to steer clear from is the crazy people who try to lure you with their nice smiles and kindness. Now an incident had taken place where a man cornered me in the staircase and me being the kind idiot, I apologise. Of course in return I get a creepy smile and the following remark; “it’s okay, I like bumping into you.” – forgive me if I’m borderline scared but DUDE! After this incident we became what they call the hello and goodbye relationship kind of people. Soon enough I was asked out for coffee. Now things would probably take a turn for the worst if I had let him pay but I can afford $4.95 so I paid. After that, we were friends. See I think to tackle harassment (if that even is classified as harassment) is to be normal about the whole issue. Be your own person, independent and just face it. Now bullying on the other hand, mate you need to gather your issue together and knock the bully out. End of discussion. I think with this article I’d like to point out how bullying, favouritism and harassment is in almost every workplace, but we should face it and tackle it together.

 

Soundtracks for the broken hearted

We’ve all felt grief. Whether it is from losing a loved one or losing a lover and trust me I’ve been on both ends and it’s the worst.  Now some of us would rather go out and explore our surrounding and try to become happy again, but there are some of us who like to sulk around for a while and cry it all away- that would be me. So here are my top picks to sulk to!

1)     “U got it bad” by Usher. Such a good old school slow jam to start the devastating night with! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o3IWTfcks4k )

2)     “Everything I do” by Bryan Adams.  (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGoWtY_h4xo )

3)     “Right Here Waiting For You” by Richard Marx. OH THE GRIEF! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_E2EHVxNAE )

4)     “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston. Beautiful song by a beautiful lady. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3JWTaaS7LdU )

5)     “How Do I” by Trisha Yearwood. Classic song from a classic movie! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jckKmsCsmio )

6)     “When You Say Nothing At All” by Ronan Keating. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AuJrEBtmM1Q )

7)     “We Belong Together” by Mariah Carey. The amount of times I have placed this on repeat is undeniable. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0habxsuXW4g )

8)     “Here With-out You” by Three Doors Down. You simply can’t love this song! Even if you’re not broken hearted. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kPBzTxZQG5Q )

9)     “Kako Polse Nas” by Sasa Kovacevic. I don’t understand a single word of this song but music is music when it touches the soul. This one touched me to my core. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fSqs0V3VtOM)

10) “Tujhe Bhula Diya” by Mohit Chauhan. My favourite Hindi song of all time. Music is global. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWRbn5xfxOY )

By Sylvia Isha Naidu for Warhols Children ©

How to act normal

How to act normal

Guide to behave acceptably in modern day society

We all have a crazy side, some of us choose to show the world and others decide to keep it private.  But no matter what happens there will be some lunatic person who will always tell you “act normal, you freak.” Unfortunately there aren’t any written rules on how you’re actually supposed to act normal. I mean even I get called crazy and people give me the scary eye stare, but dude I’m Sylvia, ask anyone, I’m pretty crazy so it’s ironic to be getting the lowdown on how to be normal, but here’s my 5 golden rules on getting accepted by modern day society.

  1. DO NOT SCREAM! Whatever you do, whoever you see, and wherever you are, don’t scream out anything that isn’t important. Don’t scream YEAH YEAH (like I do) in the middle of Bankstown UNLESS you’re aiming it at a mate.
  2. DO NOT LOL! Dude, laughing out loud is such a bad thing in society, or that’s what my mother tells me. People think you’ve lost it completely. Unless you share the joke, which might get awkward.
  3. Act your age! There is nothing worse than a group of people acting like they’re 16 when really they’re 20. Even acting older than what you really are is uncool.
  4. Keep up with mainstream media! Nowadays it’s all about pop culture. The music, television and film world thrive on the younger generation. You have got to know all the big names in the music industry, all the latest trends and television programs people are being sucked into. Nothing worse than being part of a conversation and the next minute you have no idea who sings “Pound the alarm” (I only found out a week ago, SO BEWARE). Even if you’re not interested in mainstream media, just know the flow, you’ll be considered normal.
  5. SMILE! Yes, smile. A smile a day will make the rain go away. A little wishful thinking will make someone or other happier. Knowing not everyone is snobby is comforting. Least there’s someone in the world that smiles. Hard to find a nice one these days.

So there it is, my 5 golden rules on “How to act normal”, they work, trust me. 

 

For Warhol’s Children. ©

Barbie.

Barbie turned me cynical

Barbie, a global phenomenon since 1959, creating a whole new world for women of all ages, creating a whole new line of beauty and social warfare and maintaining her figure even after all these years. Barbie was, is, and will be a global figure for girls; she comes in all different races, jobs and styles. Thus promoting it subtlety to us, our minds are enriched by her sense of style, how she mixes and matches her outfits, our minds are engrossed by how Barbie comes in different colours, and showing us how there are different people all around the world. Barbie also has many jobs and iconic figurines such as, “the homemaker”, “the Malibu” and “the tennis”. There are tons more dolls and figurines that show us different aspects of our lives.

I grew up with Barbie dolls. I had almost ten dolls and all of them vastly different from one another. My favourite ones were “Cooking Barbie”, “Beauty Barbie” and “Homemaker Barbie”. Quite a collection honestly, and of course growing older, I naturally gave them away to my neighbourhood children. Passing on precious memories and quality life principles? I couldn’t help but think now, is Barbie the reason I grew up with these certain aspects installed in me? I mean, did cooking barbie make me realise how I wanted to become a chef and did homemaker barbie lead me to thinking being a housewife is the perfect life? And better yet, is it because of beauty Barbie that I am now a very self-conscious 20 year old? 

Eating disorders and body type issues, self-esteem and the perception of beauty has been a part of anybody’s life since the day they step into the world. Although the creator of Barbie never intended to damage social norms and media, Barbie; the blonde bombshell, managed to gather enough ammo to release a sea of un-nurtured and psychotic women. On a diet frenzy, on a frenzy of looking gorgeous, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. This doll that was created for little girls to play with had turned into a sexualised play thing that encouraged women to have a tiny waist line and curvaceous hips. Have perfect long hair, and the perfect pouting lips. Oh how the world turned into a sexualised economy. The psychological benefits from Barbie seem very little compared to the negative side of it. Barbie was damned for bring self-esteem and social development into a young child’s mind. Dressing her up in clothes that seemed too small or too tight, showing every ounce of her damn perfect figure. Was I supposed to have this figure when I grow older and wear clothes inspired by my childhood love? The influence this plastic doll has is immense. She encourages young girls to follow dreams and whatever they wish to pursue in the future, yet pressurises us into forming the thought of beauty and perfection. Oh how I hate Barbie now. She turned me into a cynical lady. I have too much confidence in me, and I’m always brought down back to earth when I see a girl prettier than me. I still think beauty is having a tiny waist and wearing un-naturally tight and small clothing, in order to have a boyfriend or any potential partner in the future. Barbie teaches us in order to have a good life with everything perfect, you just need to have good looks. And for that reason, I gave away every Barbie doll and accessory I ever had. 

 

For Warhol’s Children.